Repeat After Me… or…Vocal Therapy Is Not My Thing

Shortly after the top surgery it was clear that there were people still misgendering me. While I’d most often been addressed as “sir” before surgery, I was finding that “ma’am” was creeping into the picture a little more than I liked. Frankly, I didn’t like it one bit. I’d always had the issue over the phone but in person it hadn’t been so common in the past. I thought that if my voice pitch was lower – more masculine – this problem would go away.

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What’s In A Name?

Some transgender persons choose to change their name to something that they feel better suits them or is more in line with the gender to which they identify. I was fortunate to have been given fairly unisex first and middle names and I had no desire to change them – other than the spelling. I was told that my maternal grandfather had named me thinking or hoping that I would be a boy. When it was discovered at birth that I appeared to be a girl, they put the female spelling of my name on my birth certificate. I have friends who labor untold hours and weeks and even months over what name they want for their self. My process was easy. I simply legally changed both my first and middle names to the perceived masculine spelling.

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An Open Letter to the St. Louis LGBTQIA+ Community

I have walked across the sticky floor of the darkroom at Faces untold times carrying DJ equipment through…nasty; and I have had to replace a broken toilet in the second floor restroom at the Loading Zone on a busy Saturday night – more than once – because some of you thought having sex there would be cleaner than the floor or sink…nasty. Most of you don’t know me, but I have worked in more than half a dozen of the bars in this community over the past two decades, in a number of roles, and I have had to deal with the nasty that goes with that. But I have never met anything so nasty as what I’ve seen from this group of people like I have the past couple of weeks.

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We Have To Do Better – It’s Pride Season, for Fuck’s Sake!

Nothing gets the gay community talking like throwing a little drama in their faces. Here’s the thing, now we have a conversation going, don’t we? That tells me it was the right decision. It was right for Pride St. Louis to want no uniformed officers in the parade, it was right for Mayor Krewson to support the ask, and it was right for the SLPD to support the decision – as difficult as that must have been for them to do, having LGBTQIA officers in their departments.

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A Little Off The Top…a.k.a. Surgery Day

Morning – or what would pass as morning as early as it was – came quickly. The plan was to be on the road between 2:30 and 3:00 am. We would be on the highway and well on our way before most people were even thinking about getting out of bed for the day. There would be no morning coffee or breakfast for me since I’d been given strict orders for nothing after midnight in preparation for the surgery.

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